Third Annual Advent Carnival

Kerry over at A Ten O'Clock Scholar is hosting again the Anglican Advent Carnival! It has so helped me fascilitate and learn the liturgy of Advent the past couple years. Please go over and read all the great posts about how others prepare their hearts for Advent.

Advent

Stir us up, O Lord, to make ready for your only-begotten Son. May we be able to serve you with purity of soul through the coming of him who lives and reigns.

The first Sunday in Advent is November 29th this year. I think every year I wonder how quickly it got here. Some years I don't feel like I was paying attention, others, I felt so crazed that it was over before I caught up. This year I feel somewhat cognizant of what is actually going on around me. This does not mean I am planned all the way through Advent or any other sort of foolishness. But, I am ready to prepare my heart for Advent. And I guess that is what it is about! Because, if I am ready, then, I am somewhat prepared to walk my children through it also!

I went back and looked at different things we have done over the years. So much we have learned as a family since then. But this week I discovered this blog. It brought to my heart a few things...one, it is not Christmas until December 25th, no matter what sale's ads tell you! I SO understand the anticipation and longing to make this season seem longer than it is and to LAST longer than it does. But when you follow the calendar of Advent, Christmastide and Epiphany, it really does last longer than we think! So much depth to this season that I have missed before, even growing up in the church. I just love how the author of this post expresses that, even just through the music alone! Its about the anticipation, we are SUPPOSED to feel that way! But anticipation of WHAT?!? I have understood the answer to that question for years, but I feel I finally *get it* this year on a deeper level. But, thats how God's word works, ever growing inside of us.
Another thing it brought to my heart was: to give understanding of the anticipation that the kids feel.
I am typically not anti-consumerism (in general), but the more I start to get this on a spiritual level, the more I see how it totally steals. It steals from our joy, our anticipation, our true happiness, all of it (if we are really honest with ourselves). Of course we will give gifts this year, but I want my children to understand *why* they feel those butterflies in their bellies. Its, dare I say, God ordained, to point back to Him! They're all signs to point back to the One who it is all about! Emmanual...God with us!

I do not get music the way Jennifer Miller gets music, but I understand what she is trying to express and communicate. Advent. Adventus. Ecce advenit Dominator Dominus. Behold, the Lord, the Ruler, is come. Advent is VERY different than Christmas, and I feel like that is what I am finally understanding. I feel with the traditions we have set up the past couple years, we have built the form of the spiritual truths that God wants to communicate to us this season.
It will help (hopefully) make sense because of these traditions we have used in the past! I have such a deeper anticipation even in my own heart! I am so excited to be able to communicate this with the kids and help them put meaning to that anticipation that they feel. Some of this revelation I wonder why I had not seen, not only have you come Lord, you are so patient as well! Help us look to you, Emmanual, God WITH us!

Confessions of an ESFP

Ok, most of my family and close friends know I hate (HATE) personality tests. The first time I took the Myers-Briggs (I refuse to link that...you can google it on your own:) test in 92ish, I was on staff with Youth With A Mission and we took it so we could learn how to work together. I thought it was so dumb. I have no idea why, but I remember our Director saying, your personality type hates to take these tests. That sent me over the edge!

My husband is now working toward getting ordained as a Deacon with Anglican Missions in America (AMiA) and we had to do a marriage assessment for that. Of course that entailed 5 personality tests, no joke. One was even a Spiritual Gifts test, all it really tested was my cynicism, which I am sure my Myers-Briggs fully explains:) Anyways, I have to say...I think I learned something...I don't know who Myers or Briggs are, or how they even came up with all those questions, but it helped me. Well, it helped part of me:)

My personality type was/is E (extrovert) S (sensory) F (feeling) P (perceiving). Henry is almost the same except for the end which his is J (judging). Mine is supposably *the performer*, which maybe explained me at 15, but not really now. What it did help with is...homeschooling.

What it explained to me is that I like things open ended, not structured (though my head likes to think I want to be structured), want to consider ALL possibilities, nothing set in stone because of unknown variables, flexible, likes adventure, takes risks, etc. This explains me to a T! Its actually what drives my poor hubby crazy. I even yell at him for writing in his calendar in ink, cause something might change! I NEVER write on ANY calendar in ink...its forbidden!

Link to homeschooling with four children, which really needs to be scheduled, organized (times 4), time slotted, written in ink, goal oriented, big picture minded===STRESS. And not just any ol' stress, MY stress! Something that our counselor that was in charge of giving and interpreting all of this said, was, you need to mesh your personality type with homeschooling four children. You need to lower your stress.

No duh! was what I was thinking! Thats the only thing I KNEW walking in there! It actually had been my heart's cry!

So, now I at least feel like I have a mission. I need to have a schedule that serves my children to the fullest, but doesn't stress me out and HELPS me to serve them. I am going to work on that over Advent as we take a break from the rigorous schedule that we usually are working on. I need to also trust God in this. I need to see it as a tool and not *who* I am specifically (my type wouldn't allow that anyway:).

Simplicity of the Gospel

This is the last week of Term One of this year! We are finishing off books, ending units, preparing for Thanksgiving and Advent…exciting and exhausting all at once. Yet, this was the hardest term for me. Which seems strange, since this is our seventh year of home schooling, so it should be getting easier, not harder right?

God is taking me to the END of me…all those *great* Christian clichés we often quote: ‘more of Him, less of us’, ‘Him increase while we decrease’, ‘in our weakness He is strong’ (ok, that one is really scripture)…you get my point. Well, if you have ever truly fleshed that out…you don’t really pray those when you are IN it…you mostly start saying, “OH GOD! HELP!” Which I suppose is His point! Nevertheless, the process is so very valuable, and yet excruciating all at the same time. And even more important: eternal.

Then tonight, I came across this quote in my BSF study notes on John 6: “In order to recognize and appreciate a supernatural work of God, it is first necessary to recognize its impossibility on a human level.” Which, quite honestly, makes me cuss every time…not kidding.

Home schooling, obviously has been easy for me to handle until this point. I have made it work, had fun, learned the Charlotte Mason method, learned about my children, enjoyed my children. Then this year (the most organized I have ever started), cannot make it work, yell more than I want to, cuss out Charlotte Mason and not enjoying my children like I want and I don’t even want to know what they thought of me the past couple weeks.

And, yet, its not even really all about ME…I can so make every hard time and/or Bible lesson about me, about how I am changing, about how I am becoming a moldable vessel to him, about my fruit, about how THIS scripture spoke to ME, etc, etc.

The real question remains:

What about my homeschooling reveals the Glory of God?

Am I focusing on the food that is perishable, instead of the food that is imperishable?

“Do not labor for the food that perishes, but for the food that endures to
eternal life, which the Son of Man will give to you. For on him God the Father
has set his seal.” John 6:27

What does Jesus say that this imperishable food is?? Jesus answers some of the 5000 that just ate the miraculous ‘3 loaves, 2 fish’ meal (they just experienced a miracle, a sign of who He is, and MISSED the whole point) : verse 29: This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.

That’s it??? No steps? Just believe? Are you sure? It’s not harder? more complicated?

Lord forgive me of my UNbelief.

I am t.r.y.i.n.g. to make sure school is enjoyable, not scarring, creates a love of learning and knowledge, builds good habits, is structured, provides lessons of character building. On and on and on and on I could go. Efforts toward food that perishes;

He says…BELIEVE in the one who was sent.